What Makes A Bad Movie "Good"?

Before I start off with a bit of B-Movie reviewing action, I feel its probably best to outline what makes a so-called "bad movie" "good" in my opinion. As a fairly consistent viewer of the lesser-half of mainstream cinema, I've been visiting B-Movie sites for a long while now, and one of the more helpful sets of criteria for finding a "good" B-movie resides here- at Andrew Borntreger's Badmovies.org. And that's all well and good, finding a B-movie is about the easiest thing you can do.













This is pretty clearly not in the upper echelon of cinema.

The real question is how do you find a good B-movie? Well, if my criteria is anything to go by (which its not) these four criteria should help.

1. If its a horror movie how much blood/gore/violence is in it?

- If it should be a lot, than it needs to be a lot. Sometimes the best part of a B-movie is the overt violence and gore. The only thing more important is...

2. Female Nudity- Yes? No? How Much?

- Most red-blooded American men will watch any given movie for the chance to see some titties. Embrace your inner twelve-year old, female nudity can make even the crappiest movies seem worth watching.

Addendum: The inverse is true for male nudity. The more cock the less rock.

3. How's The Acting - Stupidly Fun, or Just Plain Stupid?

- Most movies live or die by their actors, and their respective acting talent (or lack thereof). B-movies are expected to have acting talent reminiscent of 70's porno films or your family's vacation videos. But remember, stupidity can still be fun. Entertainment doesn't have to intelligent to be worthwhile.

4. That Certain "X-Factor"

- That one thing in a movie that makes it just incredible. Its rare that you run into one of these, and I've yet to find one. Its like the female G-Spot, only a lot more painful to look for.